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The Daily Has Ditched

You knew it would happen, and you knew it would be soon. Andrew Sullivan has turned with indignant fury against Barack Obama. The triggering event for Andrew was President Obama’s decision to seek to block the release of photographs depicting the abuse of detainees held by U.S. authorities. And it is not simply that Obama has done a grave moral wrong. “Slowly but surely,” Sullivan writes, “Obama is owning the cover-up of his predcessors’ [sic] war crimes. But covering up war crimes, refusing to proscute [sic] them, promoting those associated with them, and suppressing evidence of them are themselves violations of Geneva and the UN Convention. So Cheney begins to successfully coopt [sic] his successor.”

The full depth of this co-option is not readily apparent to most people — but nothing gets past Andrew’s keen eye, which can discern intricate patterns where the rest of us see only dots. “Given the president’s decision to start aggressively covering up the torture policies of his predecessors and thereby owning them,” Sullivan writes, “Obama’s pick as head of his — and it now truly is his — war in Afghanistan [Lieutenant General Stanley McChrystal] is interesting.” And why, you might ask, is it “interesting”? Because McChrystal has been “praised to the skies” by none other than… Dick Cheney. Ah, yes, the Evil Genius Cheney is co-opting the naïve, unknowing Obama.

But there is more, much more, to this sordid tale.

President Obama, we learn from Andrew, is the “neocon in chief.” That may come as news to you, but not to Sullivan. “From extending and deepening the war in Afghanistan, to suppressing evidence of rampant and widespread abuse and torture of prisoners under Bush, to thuggishly threatening the British with intelligence cut-off if they reveal the brutal torture inflicted on Binyam Mohamed,” Andrew writes, “Obama now has new cheer-leaders [sic]: Bill Kristol, Michael Goldfarb and Max Boot.”

A veritable Axis of Evil, those three.

But it doesn’t stop there; the tentacles of this conspiracy just keep spreading. According to Sullivan, another unholy troika — Andrew McCarthy, Jonah Goldberg, and I — are involved in the web as well. “It’s critical for their position,” Andrew writes, “that the lie that Abu Ghraib was an exception and not policy be maintained. Any evidence to the contrary must be suppressed. And if they can get Obama to cover up for Bush, their own task in preventing accountability for war crimes becomes much easier.”

And so our efforts to “get Obama to cover up for Bush” are finally, at long last, paying off. Those endless, expensive, curse-laden private lunches with Rahm Emanuel and David Axelrod — held at an undisclosed restaurant in a nondescript building located somewhere outside of D.C. (and paid for by Dick Cheney) — are finally bearing fruit.

And who, you might ask, will stand up against this vast conspiracy? Why, Andrew Sullivan, of course. It’s true that people like the Washington Post’s David Ignatius are unwitting tools in this grand cover-up. “The MSM cannot see the question of torture and violation of the Geneva Conventions as a matter of right and wrong, of law and lawlessness,” Sullivan writes. “There is truth and power,” you see. “In this town, you know what side the MSM is on.” Thankfully for us, Andrew the Intrepid is on the side of truth. But it comes at a very high cost. “[T]he advocates for real change and accountability have to go through this buzz-saw of resistance,” we learn.

What Andrew has had to endure as a Watchman on the Walls of Truth, it appears, has been even more difficult than undergoing waterboarding itself.

And what is next, you might ask? A friend of mine pointed out to me what I was too blind to see. “It won’t be long,” he wrote, “before Andrew questions the paternity of the Obama children, and the dog.”



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