Commentary Magazine


Contentions

Paul, R.I.P.

We are sad to report:

Paul the Octopus, who gained fame by predicting results at the World Cup, died in his tank on Tuesday morning at the Sea Life aquarium in Oberhausen, Germany. Paul correctly predicted the outcome of all seven of Germany’s World Cup matches.

Lest you think that 2 1/2 was too young and the “natural causes” explanation fishy, I can report that the octopus gurus at the National Zoo in Washington (on previous visits unrelated to Paul) told me that two to three years is the normal lifespan of these creatures. We hope he enjoys an eternity of soccer game predictions, far from the PETA protesters, who would have been all too happy to set him “free” into a wild in which he would have been ill-equipped to survive.