Commentary Magazine


The Heaven and Hell Joke

julyjoke

The gateway between Heaven and Hell is broken. No one can get into the underworld. As a result, the lobby where the souls of the newly dead must wait to be judged is getting very crowded.

The archangel Gabriel calls Satan.

“According to our contract, it’s your job to fix this,” Gabriel says.

“I know,” Satan says, “but what can I tell you, Gabe? My handymen all went on strike.”

“That’s not my problem,” Gabriel says. “We have a contract.”

“Look, be reasonable,” Satan says. “They’ll get to it, maybe next Thursday.”

“You leave me no choice,” Gabriel says. “We’ll have to sue.”

“Oh, come on,” Satan says. “Where are you going to find a lawyer?”

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