With apologies to Meredith Willson, the author of the great Broadway show The Music Man, following along the lines of his song (you can hear it here) “Iowa Stubborn.”

Well, there’s nothing halfway

About the Iowa way of doing things

When caucuses and leap years come to call.

There’s an Iowa kind of stupid

Bruise-on-the-brainstem attitude

That makes us cook Fried Twinkies

For the pols.


We can be full

Of the worst kind of

Self-aggrandizing nonsense

When you ask how we will allocate ourselves.

And we’re so by-damn stubborn

We made an app to add up all the votes

And preened ‘cause we only spent 60K.


But we’ll thrill you a lot

By indulging your paranoia

When our app just happens to die!


So what the heck

You’re welcome.

Glad to have you with us.

You can have the delegate that you brought for yourself.

You really ought to give Iowa a pass.

Iowa Stupid via @commentarymagazine
+ A A -
You may also like
Share via
Copy link